the working life

If you're reading this, then you must be terribly optimistic, or terribly bored, because I haven't posted here in months. Welcome to the winter of my working life. Basically, since I have nothing particularly important to do on week nights, I can't procrastinate by blogging. Well technically, I suppose I could - but there isn't much of an urge to put off "watching another episode of miami ink". Besides, what would I do to fill that procrastination time? Other than sleep, I can't think of anything. But finally, I'm sitting at my comp listening to a new album, and I can't think of any more websites to peruse, so here I am.

Yup, so probably anyone in school is hating me right now. But let me tell you... work is not quite the picnic that it's cracked up to be. Sure, once you go home, there's no more work. Except for those of you who have to work from home that is. Fortunately I am not one of these people; however, I do have the pleasure of coming in on weekends when the situation warrants it, which looks likely for this weekend in fact. There's nothing that makes you feel older than working on a weekend. And it makes you feel like a sucker... on one hand, I really couldn't care less about the work, since it's not something that I feel is improving society or life or anything. But of course, on the other hand, there's something strange called "Sense of Duty", whereby if something is your responsibility (however you managed to get stuck with doing whatever), you gotta do what you gotta do. That also makes me feel real old.

(Man it is fricken cold in my basement... saving money, I mean, the environment, means my fingers freeze from typing.)

The other thing about work is the whole Corporate Environment. It's like this whole fake sense of community and team-player-ness permeating the building, and I swear it makes me sick because by the end of the day I am totally drained, which is odd considering what my stamina is like during school. There are so many things that don't make any sense and so many stupid people deciding (or not deciding) stupid things and all of these stupid people are venting about how other people are stupid. And then there are the "political moves". For example, I got assigned to something that I have absolutely no knowledge of, something that even full timers aren't too clear on, and I was told that it was a "political move". Since then, I haven't actually been called on to be involved in anything. Even though I'm sure meetings have been going on. So sure, if you want something to go down the drain, but don't want to say that out loud, just assign a random non-permanent team member to it, and I guess your problem is solved. I find it all very uninspiring.

Next, what makes me want to avoid work for as long as possible (i.e. grad school) is that, if I just returned to this kind of job after undergrad, my undergrad degree would be pretty much useless. My job really doesn't involve anything that I'd consider very technical. I mean sure, I work in the electronics industry, we manufacture circuit boards, I know a lot about soldering and sometimes I get to use some interesting equipment. But pretty much anyone with common sense could figure out the problems that I solve. Maybe I'm taking for granted the type of 'common sense' that an engineering background brings out, but seriously, this is totally not rocket science. A lot of it involves reading up on things, and buying things. Which involves internet research and calling up lots of random sales people and getting in demo equipment and testing the equipment and implementing the equipment. It's like if you wanted to buy a TV, and you researched the differences between LCD, plasma, etc, then decided on which one to buy. Only with more analness and documentation (i.e. more annoyances). People buy TVs all the time. So that's what my job is like, only it's not a TV that I'm looking to buy, and it won't be for me (OK so it's not with my money either, but anyways). There's been maybe one day in the past few months where I was doing some testing that was fun, playing with parameters and seeing what I could get. The rest is chasing after people and getting quotes and basically being someone's bitch.

Which leads me to one other thing - delegation. Man, I need them to hire another student quick, so that I can delegate some bitchwork. In principle, delegation is necessary and efficient. That is, IF the person in charge of delegating isn't an idiot. When nobody talks to anyone else and 5 people get delegated the same task (which btw is likely in an area outside of their regular duties/expertise) except they don't know that anyone else is working on the same thing, then something is effed up. And usually, the person doing the delegating doesn't do anything else but delegate, and so they spend their time harrassing all of the people they've given their tasks to, while complaining about how much work they have and how they're tired, thus making it even slower for the unlucky peeps who are lower on the food chain. And in a prime example of a vicious cycle, once the bottom folks get promoted a level up, they promptly turn into the same kind of idiot they once despised, out of spite.

So basically, you can see what I really got out of all of this work experience - a dose of bitter reality, disillusionment, and the feeling that if I stay stuck in this now, there is nothing left to look forwards to and it's all downhill from here. Of course, this is just one place, and one job. But from what I gather from the old timers, things aren't too much different elsewhere. To be just a plain old engineer is to work without getting the respect you deserve, at least in North America. So unless you've got that business streak and ambition in you, or have the philosophy that work is not life (even though you spend a huge portion of your time alive working), I would suggest staying in school, where you can nap when you want to, and where you are working and learning for yourself and not the man.

posted by starfire @ 10:02 PM 0 comments

something funny

It's been awhile since I've posted comments about x subject on x webpage. I used to poke around in various online 'communities' back in highschool, out of curiosity and an enjoyment of talking to random people halfway around the world. Of course, you can't really do that these days, with the number of sickos out there, but I remember back in the first years of ICQ, when I had a family from Australia on my list and we just chatted very cordially about life. The need to reach out and connect with people that you don't know is very interesting, and it is harder these days to find sites where people's motives are innocent. However, today I posted a comment and joined a discussion with strangers. The subject was religious icons in advertising, and naturally a whole slew of ideas and comments sprung up, many not related to the original subject, but equally interesting. The site was a science news page, so someone brought up science vs. religion. I love this topic, so I couldn't resist.

A few hours after I posted my comment, I was naturally drawn back to the page, to see if anyone had responded to my ideas. This is what greeted me:


"Hi Starfireplus,

I think we may have had a coffee at the Red Umbrella, in Vancouver, a few years back. But if not, you do type (sound) familiar."

Now, I only wish that I had a chance to visit Vancouver ;) But it is pretty funny. Is it that easy for me to sound like someone else? I'm not even sure what about my typing makes me sound like me. At any rate, the experience was entertaining. Reminded me of tarsaye's post "Am I replaceable?"

Anyways, there is a fine line between creepiness and, well, non-creepiness. But I do like to imagine a life where people randomly go out for coffee as a chance meeting, discussing things that puzzle and interest us all. I suppose that is what is so great about public online communities - passerbys can drop in anytime, and who knows what you will learn or share. And all that with no commitment.

posted by starfire @ 5:04 PM 0 comments

Season Premieres

OK, so i still don't have cable tv, and i am still suffering from my stupid bandwidth cap. Nevertheless, I have kept up with my shows. And I have to say... WTF??? Is it me, or did everything just dissolve into utter crap?

Consider:

1. Desperate Housewives
• How anti-climactic can you get? I was bored. Maybe I was expecting too much, but the secrets aren't very interesting.
  
2. Veronica Mars
• Not very satisfying, and very very random. Poor Logan Echolls. Duncan still creeps me out. That 'case' was stupid, and completely useless to the 'story'.
3. Alias
• I read an article about Alias in Star Week, describing what this season has in store for us. A new rookie spy who will learn the ropes, eh. I said "If they kill Vaughn then I'm not going to watch anymore. And I dislike babies." Guess what happened? Stupid Jennifer Garner, you suck.
  

The one returning show that I follow and am not (yet) disappointed in, is Lost. Granted, I have not yet seen the last 3 episodes of the first season (downloading now, good thing it's the end of the month so my limit gets reset), but the show is even more amazing than I thought it was. All of the episodes I had missed last year contained something crazy that just thickened the plot and made things that much cooler. So many questions!!!!! I can't see them screwing it up at this point... there's still a lot of story to reveal, things are still building up, so hopefully there's a lot of life left in this series. I can't wait to get all caught up to this new season.

Annnd.... yeah, that's it. You can tell I'm on PEY (in 'sauga) when... (i haven't really had anything worth posting in a month, and when i finally do post, it's about TV)

posted by starfire @ 9:22 PM 1 comments

drinking from the firehose... no wait... the opposite

Cogeco is the stinkiest ISP evar. If you haven't heard of it, that's because it services areas outside of Toronto, i.e. places you never hear about. Like Oakville. Not only am I suffering from intermittent service due to bad old water damaged (or something) cable and slow speeds due to being physically the farthest from junction boxes, but I also have to deal with 15 GB bandwidth/month limit. Uploading + downloading, combined. I went from super speed unlimited bandwidth paradise in Toronto, to sulking around because I can't dl the rest of Veronica Mars, having used up 80% of the bandwidth for this month (and that was on August 8th).

I've already tanked the episodes of VM that I did get, plus season 4 of Teen Titans. And with no cable tv, right now I've got... nothing. AHH just when I FINALLY have the time to be a huge bum and watch tv to my heart's content, I can't! OK so I know that I totally sound like a whiny materialistic technology ingrate, but pretty much anyone who reads this would be chafing in my situation. So bah.

posted by starfire @ 6:50 PM 0 comments

paranoia

I now live in constant fear of discovering yet another 2-inch, lightning fast, shudder-inducing abomination in my living areas in the basement. Things didn't used to be so bad; I mean, I've lived in this house since I was in Grade 6, and I've lived in the basement since the end of
highschool. So I've definitely had a number of close encounters with the creepy crawlies. Granted, I'm now faced with the reality of living down here for a full 16 months, whereas previously, the longest consecutive stretch has been about 8 months. Perhaps the fact that I'm
now stuck here with no escape is making me go batty. Or perhaps... just perhaps... it's because one night last week, I found a member of the bug that haunts my worst nightmares IN MY BED.

OK, so since I already don't like bugs, finding any bug in my bed is beyond disgusting for me. But there are varying degrees of revulsion. Those little black armored things that are shaped like ovals and their legs are hidden beneath their beetle-like carapace (I don't know their
real name, but I've always thought of them as 'trundle bugs' because they are always trundling along ever so slowly) - they're no big. Not much of a shudder, and there's no scrambling or chasing or running away involved, plus they are quite an easy catch with my weapon of choice,
the vacuum cleaner. Spiders I can also deal with, I even have disposed of a huge one, the size of a quarter, all by myself (and a jar and some paper). You'll notice here that I am incapable of actually touching bugs voluntarily, not even with a tissue or some paper towel.

Then comes my nemesis: the house centipede. These motherfuckers are absolutely disgusting. When grown some, they are at least 2 inches long, and a good portion of that length results from the legs. I'd say that the legs are a good centimeter long, and they have 15 pairs of legs. One pair of those legs are even longer than the others, and they are apparently used for 'lasso-ing prey, so that the hapless victim can be injected with VENOM. House centipedes eat spiders, for gods' sakes. Apparently, if they ever bite you, it's as painful as a bee sting. I've also read that they live up to 6 FREAKIN' YEARS. So all of those carapaces that I've seen lying around over the years, aren't dead centipedes, they are just carapaces. Molted off cuz the beast is GROWING!!! *Growing faint here*

So, if you're somehow not grossed out yet (I dunno, cuz you're macho, or one of them), then go and check out a nice big picture of them here. I can't post that picture straight up because I can't handle looking at it for very long. It was enough just to find a decent picture for your
viewing pleasure.

Back to my story - I had had a lovely and amazing evening with the TSO and Anthony Daniels (the guy who played C3PO) and a galaxy far, far away. Really, it was quite thrilling, and to dig myself even further into that gaping pit of nerd-dom, I'll admit that I always get goosebumps when I hear that opening theme, all the more so with a live orchestra. Plus, there was even a choir, so that the whole Duel of the Fates theme was wicked.

The only downer was that I was sick. I think I caught the cold from my dad, and the day of the concert was the first full-fledged day of wonderful symptoms, so by the end of it, I was very ready to go home and sleep. I also had to get to work by 7 am the next morning, 1.5 hours
earlier than usual, for some training (involving vats of chemicals, yay).

So I finally get home, and head down to my room. A flick of the lightswitch, and GAHHHHHHHHH there's a centipede on my bed, sitting near the corner on my blankets. The shock changed to anger soon after, since I was sick and tired and all I wanted to do was go to sleep, and yet there's this disgusting creature violating my sleeping place. I grab the vacuum. I position the nozzle as best I can over the vile thing, though it was awkward due to having to stretch almost to the wall with my bed width in my way. I turn on the power, and dangnabbit, of course the vacuum starts sucking my blanket and I can't get loose from it. Now this is the part that has scarred me for life - the centipede (a big one too) scrambles away, on my sheets all the way across the length of my bed, and falls into the crack between my mattress and bedframe. This was the last straw for me, I was utterly revolted. There was no way that I was going to sleep in my bed now. I ran away and was pretty much reduced to tears from being sick, tired, feverish, and traumatized. I ended up sleeping upstairs on the couch in our family room.

The next day, I had my dad scout out my room for me. He sprayed Raid liberally everywhere (the kind containing some deadly (to bugs) chemical derived from chrysanthemums). We also ended up tossing mothballs into all the various nooks and crannies in my room. Now as I sit here, the faint scent of mothballs and flowers fills the air. Maybe I should also research whether I'm endangering my health with these fumes.

I know I should also clean my room completely, and organize every piece of junk so that my floor is completely bare. But I can't bring myself to do that because I'm afraid of what will jump out at me if I lift things off the floor. My fear of bugs has been turned into an actual paranoia, as I constantly survey my surroundings in search of the crawlers. I think I'm going crazy because before, I've only encountered them on the floor, and above that level. Now, they could be ANYWHERE.

On my bathroom trips in the middle of the night, I use my glasses so that I may spot any bathroom intruders. Indeed, a couple of nights ago, I saw 2: one small one trying to climb into the shower (while I was in the shower, shudder), and one big one (the one that got away?) at the foot of the sink. I dealt swift vacuum death to the small one, but ran away from the big one, and went to the washroom upstairs.

If anyone is doing a research project on using novel methods to help people get over their paranoias - count me in as your subject. Or just give me a 24-7 bug killer who will scout out the basement for me and dispose of any nasties.

posted by starfire @ 7:40 PM 4 comments

paraphernalia

It's the little things that make me love my stuff even more :)



I saw that they are coming out with a stormtrooper (or was it clone trooper) version of this, but I'm perfectly satisfied with just this. So cute!



Here's the Clone Wars cartoon version of General Grievous. Some people don't like the animation much, but I do. Grievous was so kick-ass and scary in the cartoons... then what happened, George?



Does anyone remember the Wuzzles?? Cuz I sure don't. But I found this party cup in the cupboard, a remnant of my childhood.

posted by starfire @ 12:50 AM 2 comments

my cape and marcus

I've been meaning to put this up. ahahaha if that's not great then i don't know what is.

posted by starfire @ 8:58 PM 0 comments

random marketing gem and "fuck you George Lucas!"

posted by starfire @ 8:25 PM 0 comments